It has been nice and cool here. The past couple days it has been cloudy, and today it is sunny but only 85. Far cry from Colorado, with golf-sized hail and tornadoes. I must admit, however, that I rather wish I was enjoying the Gulf winds in Panama City, where the rest of my family is visiting my grandparents. I wish I were with them. Funny thing is, I'm not exactly sure why I'm not. Because I can't afford to take a week off work, I suppose. Or a plane ticket. But there has been a lot of questioning in my heart lately, mostly around the question, "Why am I here?(!?!)"
Perhaps a good explanation for my not finding a nursing job despite all my best efforts is that I'm running square into a closed door. Maybe this isn't the "right thing." But man, I sure wish I knew what the "right thing" is. It's so confusing. I still firmly believe God directed me here. And he has provided for me along the way, that is for certain. But now what?
I think of Abraham... God promised he would be the father of a great nation... and then God was silent for years and years, while Abraham waited with no kids and had to trust. God also told Abraham to pick up and leave the land of his fathers... but Abraham didn't see the "why" for awhile there either... I guess Abraham didn't see it at all in his lifetime, really.
I think of him and it's easier for me to trust. Not exactly easy, but easier.
No comments:
Post a Comment